


Moonstruck

by earthphoenix (roughknuckles)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Birthday, Declarations Of Love, Fluff, M/M, Music, Operas, Post - Prisoner of Azkaban, Singing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-02-25
Updated: 2007-02-25
Packaged: 2017-12-10 16:04:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/787890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roughknuckles/pseuds/earthphoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-Azkaban Sirius and Severus are civil with one another these days. Maybe even friends. They've each been through enough, to not be unkind to the other. So on Severus's birthday, Sirius opens up about how a fight with Severus when they were kids actually got him through his years in Azkaban.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Moonstruck

What was January 9th if not just another day. When the sun rises in the east, and would eventually set in the west. What was it, but a day, hours on a clock, the passage of time. Marking another year. Another year older.  
  
Severus Snape lay in his bed, dead asleep, hair over his face, shielding him from the morning sunlight that just barely managed to find a way in through the dark blue curtains of the guest bedroom of 12 Grimmauld Place. Severus was still fully dressed from the night before and simply curled up on the bed, hugging his pillow.  
  
His door opened quietly and someone padded in on bare feet. The bed creaked under Sirius's weight as he climbed in, although the time in Azkaban had taken it's toll on him. Sirius never complained, not when they were alone, not like this. "Happy birthday to you ..." he sang under his breath, "happy birthday to you-"

Severus groaned, "Hhhmm?" his head just barely picking up from the pillow, eyes closed, though eyebrows coming together as if squinting to see.

"Happy birthday deeear professor Severus Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaape- happy birthday to youuuu."

"Ugh!" Severus shoved his head under his pillow, "It's not … is it?"

Sirius had by now snuggled himself under the covers, ankle tangled with Severus's black pant leg. He just sighed and pressed his straight nose against Severus's black hair. "Are you awake?"

"No." Severus mumbled.

Sirius smiled, his voice sounding oddly smooth for the morning hours. "I guess your present will have to wait, then."

There was a moment of tremendous, deadly silence; then Severus pulled his head out from under his pillow, "I have a present?"

"Yes. You have two presents in fact."

"Really?" Severus asked with a child's easily amazed eagerness. 

Sirius smiled and stroked Severus over his arm, "But you have to come down to the ballroom for it, before anyone else gets up."

"Alright." Severus agreed with some caution; though a hand abandoned his pillow and rested over Sirius's hand, thumbing over the man's knuckles.

Sirius smiled, almost blushing. "Okay, come on, before anyone else gets there ..." he slid out of the bed and hauled Severus out with him. "Nice pajamas."

Severus held Sirius by the hand as he allowed the other man to led him to his doom, "It's not really my birthday, is it?" He said groggily.

"It's January 9th ..." They walked down many staircases with twists and turns until Sirius opened a large door to the glittering ballroom, all done in dark green marble. "Over here," he led Severus to a single chair in the middle of the room and made sure the door was closed and locked, a silencing spell over it.

"You got me a chair?" Severus was not disappointed, just amused.

Sirius laughed and led him to the chair, sitting him down. Sirius was dressed normally, jeans and a sweater. "Okay ..." he paced back and forth, "I'm going to do something I've never, ever done in front of anyone. If you look directly at me while I do it, I may ... die. It's possible. And you're not allowed-" he began in earnest, shaking his head, "to tell anyone, anyone what I'm about to do."

Severus listened cautiously, "… alright Sirius … I won't look, and I won't tell."

Sirius let out a long, long breath. "Ugh. Gods, I think this is the worst idea right now. Okay ..." deep breath, "okay ... I can do this." He looked at Severus and pulled something from his jeans pocket. It was folded in a shirt that Sirius used to wear in Hogwarts, and small, flat. He handed it to Severus, looking a little white. 

Severus tried to offer a comforting, if not supportive smile, holding his hand out, "… it's ok Sirius" he said softly.

Sirius handed it to Severus, waiting for him to unwrap it out of the shirt.

Severus put the shirt on his lap and unfolded the corners, letting it fall open.

"We were ..." His voice was a little shaky, throat dry, "in herbology this time. It was scorching out and everyone had to prune moonflower plants. I ... bothered you, of course. Teased you until, as always, you snapped at me. You were _so_ mad that you resorted to throwing the only thing you had at me, a rather ineffective moonflower. You actually hit me right in the chest and stormed out of class."

There is was, dried. Kept for almost 20 years.

Severus was very quiet, just staring as the pressed flower, corner of his mouth twitching until it not only turned up, but his lips parted in a painfully uncharacteristic smile. "Oh-" though Severus had few possessions, only memories, he was very sentimental about them, "… Sirius." He looked up at the man before him.

Sirius licked his lips and kept talking, quietly. "I had it in my coat, and when they first put me in the cell, it fell out. I was taken away again for the- the ... " he just gestured to mean the gray, rough robe, "and I came back and there it was. It actually was there with me. I hid it, under a rock." His eyes went to the flower. "In the worst moments, when I almost gave up- I would just think that I had to not stop eating, because I had a job. I had to throw your dumb flower back at you, no matter how long it took. So for ... almost twelve years, my whole life boiled down to that." He pointed at the tiny, dried flower. "I had to get you back for it. It was the last thing you ever did to me at school and I never got you back for it." He looked at Severus again, "It kept me alive."

Severus had turned in on himself as Sirius spoke; both humbled and pained. Severus slowly worried his hands together, picking at nails and skin, "You haven't thrown it at me yet."

"Well, I don't want to break it. It's been through a lot." The pureblood paced again, his nerves tensing again.

Severus too was nervous, one could always tell, usually at dinner tables when he made all the utensils perfectly vertical with one another, or shredded bits of paper or as in this case, nothing before him but his own hands, one hand was fisted while the other cupped over it like a sheath. "It has."

Sirius looked at him, another deep breath, fists clenching, "So ... okay, this is the part I'm ... just, be nice." Sirius stood and took a huge breath before he pointed his wand at the piano in the room, adding music, long, drawn out cords before the rebellious Black sheep stepped closer and started to sing very very quietly. It was obvious that Sirius was untrained, but his voice was good, strong and solid.

> _La fleur que tu m'avais jetée_  
>  _dans ma prison m'était restée._  
>  _Flétrie et sèche, cette fleur_  
>  _gardait toujours sa douce odeur;_  
>  _et pendant des heures entières, sur mes yeux, fermant mes paupières,_  
>  _de cette odeur je m'enivrais_  
>  _et dans la nuit je te voyais!_

His voice softened a little on the last line but came in strong and passionately again,

> _Je me prenais à te maudire,_  
>  _à te detester, à me dire:_  
>  _Pourquoi faut-il que le destin_  
>  _l'ait mise là sur mon chemin?_  
>  _Puis je m'accusais de blasphème,_  
>  _et je ne sentais en moi-même,_

Another strong tide of his voice carried the words in the lofty room, echoing off of the stone walls,

> _Puis, je m'accusais de blasphème,_  
>  _et je ne sentais en moi même_  
>  _Je ne sentais qu' un seul désir,_  
>  _Un seul désir, un seul espoir:_  
>  _Te revoir, ô Carmen, oui, te revoir!_  
>  _Car tu n'avais eu qu'à paraître,_  
>  _Qu'à jeter un regard sur moi,_  
>  _pour t'emparer de tout mon être,_  
>  _O ma Carmen!_

Finally the music paused and his voice became very soft, climbing up the scale of notes on tiptoes, " _Et j'etais une chose a toi, Carmen, je t'aime..._ " The final piano chord hovered in the air for a moment and then dispelled like smoke and Sirius just stood there, looking at the floor, hand shaking.  
  
The skin over Severus's body began to tingle, his heart even began to speed up. Firstly, Severus Snape could not sing for his life. For. His. Life. Secondly, even though Severus barely knew a few words of French, having preferred to take the more angry language, German, when he had studied, he was profoundly touched as Sirius serenaded him; one did not need to know the language to enjoy Opera, of which Severus was thoroughly obsessed with.  To the untrained, the language would have been a barrier, leaving the man with only a mystery, but Severus knew, oh yes, he knew. "Oh … Sirius." his voice broke, even trembled. 

Sirius smiled, taking a deep breath and just walked over, kneeling in front of Severus, still not able to look up, quite. "I ..." he breathed again, "love you."

Severus's hand shook as he reached out, touching Sirius by the side of his face, encouraging him to look up.

Sirius looked up, shaking, blushing. He raised his hands, hesitant and almost overwhelmed as he looked at the man he never suspected would be the one who actually loved him; for the moody, brave, strange man he was.

Severus took Sirius by both of his hands, one in each, holding them tightly, together, bowing his head. Forehead pressed against the top of his hands; hair falling down the sides of his face, not speaking, not making a sound except for a strained gasp as Severus's back shook, heaved under the sudden weight of his confession.

Sirius couldn't stand it anymore, he wrapped his arms around Severus and pulled him down so he was kneeling with Sirius. The pureblood leaned against Snape, just breathing before he leaned in and put a shaking kiss on his lips.

Again Severus gasped, kissing Sirius quickly, then pulling his head back, fingers pressing to his lips as if they had become something unreal, pulling his hand away Severus kissed Sirius once more, another soft gasp of surprise when warm lips were met with warm lips. _He had to know._ Severus convinced himself, _Sirius must have known … after all these years, everything between us, he knew. He knows. He knows I love him. And he … he_. It was unreal. Severus kissed Sirius again, again, convincing himself, "Sirius …" he gasped, face flushed, hot, lips parting, panting.

Sirius smiled brightly and nodded, kissing Severus again, holding his face between his palms, his lips rough one moment, sweet the next.

Severus felt as though he had no strength, though he pushed himself, he had a little, "I love you Sirius." He managed, clear and perfect, confident and devoted.

Sirius gasped softly and paused for a moment, panting, "You ..."

No, Severus indeed had no strength, his eyes closed and this time though he spoke, "... ... ... Sirius" very little sound passed over his lips.

"Love ..." Sirius kissed him wildly, almost crushing him with thin arms, "love you too, love you-"  
  
Severus closed his eyes and held onto Sirius still as they knelt before one another on the floor. Severus very rarely, if ever became overwhelmed, no matter what had been asked of him, but when he was, completely overwhelmed, like he was now, the world just stopped for him. He stopped, unable to speak, move, think.

Their foreheads resting together gently, Sirius just smiled. The silence was mutual, but reverential, sweet, even as Sirius stroked the side of Severus's face, mapping the sharp angles he'd made fun of at school. "I'm ... sorry."

Severus swallowed, "… wh-y are y-ou s-or-ry?"

"Dumb things in school ... all the stupid fights, I never thought they actually hurt you."

Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, Severus managed, "Thank you … for a lovely … birthday."

"It's not over yet." He pulled out a pair of black leather gloves, very soft, light, the best sort anyone could find. "Hand?" he asked with a little smile.

Severus just blinked, reluctantly letting go of Sirius, offering his hand, even after everything, with some trepidation. 

Sirius smiled a little and put one of the gloves on gently, smoothing it over with his hands. "Other hand, please ..." His voice was warm and a little mischievous.

Again Severus offered his calloused, working man's hands to the pureblood, watching him, smiling a little to be subject worthy of such expense and attention to detail. 

Sirius smoothed them down and then kissed Severus again, a different sort of kiss. Sirius seemed, radiant, excited and nervous all at once, and for once, happy.  
  
"What … is this about then?" Severus asked quietly, looking to Sirius, intrigued, if not fascinated.

Sirius held Severus by the hands in his own and then looked up at him, "Do you trust me?"

Severus's heart began to protest, rabbiting in his chest as his breath quickened; he wasn't sure he even trusted Dumbledore sometimes, after all, no one was perfect, "What are you doing?" He tried again.

Sirius just looked at him, calm, "Do you trust me?"

Severus was quiet, his chest remained tight as he looked into his eyes, obsessing over the opportunity to stare into them, "Yes" he said, which seemed to surprised Severus as he blinked, "Yes, I trust you." He smiled a little, it came easier the second time.

Sirius smiled and leaned down, kissing him hotly, suddenly full of need and passion, cupping the back of Severus's head as they kissed in the chair.

"Oh!" Severus was surprised (of course he was surprised, there was no formula for figuring out when or _why_ someone would want to kiss him), but he whimpered, even moaned a bit into his mouth; letting Sirius direct, show perhaps what the man had been missing all these years.  
  
Almost unable to kiss, he was smiling so much. "Sev-" he cupped his face again, shifting over him a little, closer. "Love you ..." Sirius took a deep breath, repeating against Severus's lips, "I love you, you bloody git ..."

Severus instinctively moved a hand to his side, keeping Sirius at arms length, though not pushing him away as one might expect; it was possible Severus blushed, just a little, he was suddenly quite shy, "… I … I love you too." He didn't stutter because he was still afraid, or because he was being disgenuine - no - he was simply in the habit of saying something once, and once only; expecting the other party to believe him the first time and not demand repetition of any sort.  
  
Sirius smoothed his hands over the outsides of Severus's arms as he looked at him, speechless. He'd half expected to be shoved off the chair ... and maybe kissed afterwards. "I ... I didn't say it to make you say it- you know that, right?"

"Then why do you keep saying it? I believed you the first time."

Sirius laughed, "I don't know-" he kissed him again, "why do I keep kissing you or ..." he let his hand stray down Severus's back, "touching you? I want to ... Mm ... want to-" he let both hands rove down Severus's back slowly.

Severus arched his back, chest forward as Sirius touched him, "… what, do you want?" There was command in his voice once more, confidence.

"My name ... your voice ...." he kissed the side of Severus's neck, lips grazing the collar of his pajamas.

"You have your name … Sirius." Severus smirked a little, "And my voice."

Sirius moaned, "Oh ... mmmgods you make it sound so bloody good ..."

"Because you are, Sirius ... you are amazing."

Sirius gasped and laughed a little, almost groaning outright as he bit the side of Severus on the neck, very gently, sucking the skin as he worked his way up the potion's master's long neck, "Gods, you're ... making me ..."

Severus twitched a little uncomfortably as Sirius bit him, "What?" Severus gave the subtle demand, hand locked more firmly against his sides, not letting him go, but also keeping him at bay.

Sirius whimpered and kissed the skin apologetically, "Don't make me say it ..." he murmured, kissing his neck gently, with soft, hot lips.

Closing his eyes, Severus enjoyed the kisses devoted to his neck much better, he smirked, "Tell me." he demanded still, "Tell me Sirius … what am I making you …?"

Sirius smoothed his fingers over the bitten skin, making the skin tingle as he moaned and licked the skin under Severus's jaw slowly, leading up to his ear where Sirius swallowed, "Hard ..."

Severus became an innocent again, "Really?" it was strange, or perhaps not so strange on how quickly he would shift from deathly death eater to the sensitivity of a child who never had an opportunity to _be_ a child.

Sirius nodded, kissing Severus's face eagerly, gently, almost childish himself. Sirius laughed again and kissed his mouth, blushing deeply.  _Since when do I blush!?_

"Oh." Severus groaned, then attempted to destroy the blatantly lustful sound by swallowing it back down, hard. Severus hummed his pleasure into his mouth, kissing him with growing eagerness as the time passed each second.

**Author's Note:**

> co-authored. originally written for thestralskinphoenixtears
> 
> English text of Bizet's La Fleur Que Tu M'avais Jetée (The Flower Song) from the opera, Carmen:
> 
> The flower that you had thrown me,  
> I kept with me in prison.  
> Withered and dry, the flower  
> Still kept its sweet smell;  
> And for hours,  
> On my eyes, my eyelids closed,  
> I became intoxicated by its fragrance  
> And in the night I saw you!  
> I began to curse you,  
> and hating you, I began to tell myself:  
> Why should fate  
> put you on my path?  
> Then I accused myself of blasphemy,  
> And I felt within myself,  
> I only felt but one desire,  
> One desire, one hope:  
> To see you again, Carmen, oh,  
> you again!  
> For all you needed was to be there,  
> to share one glance with you  
> To long for you with all my being,  
> O my Carmen  
> And I was yours  
> Carmen, I love you!


End file.
